Sunshine state

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Yesterday morning I pressed pause on the drama that is my life. The original plan was to compete in the Warrior Dash in Orlando this weekend. My plan was to drive up on Friday and enjoy the weekend. Plans changed when my partner decided to leave town on his weekend on call. However, I refused to concede my day off.

I started the day with a leisurely breakfast and a little Matt Lauer. I then headed off to the gym. My trainer was going to the Warrior Dash so I had changed my Saturday workout to Friday morning. It was a much better idea before I had to reschedule my Wednesday workout to Thursday night. I would not recommend two hard circuit sessions within 12 hours, but I survived. After a little time in the steam room and a hot shower I was off again.

Needed to stop by the VA briefly - am covering Cardiac surgery there next week (Don't ask). Work accomplished - off to the mall. Theoretically I needed conditioner from the Aveda store, but in reality I needed retail therapy. Unfortunately the stores didn't get the memo. I couldn't really find anything that I wanted. After leaving with only a lone skirt, cuticle cream and the needed conditioner, it was time to head back to the gym.

No, I am not a masochist - it was not another workout. It was a massage, and not just any massage. I had booked a 90 minute deep tissue with David. It was truly much needed torture. I didn't realize how knotted up I was until David decided to unknot me. Although painful at the time, I now feel like a million bucks. I topped the evening off with a great book and a bubble bath.

Today has been mostly catching up on paperwork that I have been avoiding for weeks, and a grocery store run. It has been a fantastic hermit weekend. (Don't worry I still hate cats and actually am headed out to dinner with a friend tonight.) I push play on the work world again tomorrow, but at least I had a much needed commercial break.

I choose happiness

A while back, my best friend sent me a necklace with a pendant on it that said "I choose happiness". She is incredibly great that way. She seems to always know when I need a pick me up and I will get a random card or package in the mail. It is always a little reminder that there are people in the world who have my back. Oprah may have her Gayle, but I'll keep my Kris.

This necklace has become especially important as of late. To say that things have been a little strained at work is something of an understatement. It has nothing to do with patients, and everything to do with politics. We have had intrigue, collusion, conspiracy and deception - all add together to make for a great book, but not such a great working environment. It would be very easy to get caught up in the "plot" of it all, and must admit that I was for a couple of days. Then I found my necklace.

I was rooting through my jewelry drawer looking for a necklace to wear when I saw it. I mean really saw it. I read the pendant and to take the Oprahisms a little further - had my "aha" moment. At the end of the day, happiness is a choice. There are times of absolute sorrow, fear or anger, but most of the times we can take our emotions where we want them to go. We can choose to get caught up in the pettiness going on around us, or we can say "I choose happiness." I choose to believe that things happen for a reason, and at the end of the day we all get back what we put out into the world.

I will continue to be the best me that I can be. I will accept that the only person that I can control is myself. I will choose happiness and the rest of the chips can fall where they may.

Thanks Kris.

Having A Moment

I'm having a moment - and unfortunately it's not a good one.

Very long story not worth getting into, but let's just say life in the real world isn't everything it is cracked up to be. Sometimes I wonder if I work at a hospital in an "academic" center or I accidentally took a job with five year old children at an elementary school.

I am a 37 year old woman. All I ask is that all the people older than me (which is almost everyone that I work with) act their age. Simple enough right?

Trust no one, and start looking for an escape hatch.

Weekend Wrap-up

Even though it started off with a less than stellar date, I am happy to report the weekend turned out pretty great especially for a call weekend.

I won't bore you with the date details, and believe me bore you it would, Saturday dawned warm and beautiful. After a morning of rounding and interviewing surgical candidates, I headed for a quick trip to the bookstore. Not only picked up a couple of books on photography - my new hobby, but also got my first of twelve "real books" to read this year.

I am starting with Decoded by Jay-Z. Surprised? Me too, very pleasantly so. It was so beautiful on Saturday that I curled up on the day bed for a couple of hours and dug in immediately. The book so far is fascinating.

I was finally able to pull myself back inside and got a few things accomplished. Laundry, dishes, etc. (I lost my cleaning lady over the holiday so need to either find a new one or find a mop. Bet you can't guess which way I'm leaning.) Made a quick trip to Steve Madden for some new sandals I had seen in a magazine as a reward for the cleaning. Motivated by Kris, I even got a mani/pedi and my eyebrows now actually look like eyebrows. A quick stop by Whole Foods for some dinner that was consumed while watching Julie and Julia on TV.

Today back to the hospital which took longer than it should and resulted in my missing church, but at least everyone ended up alive and well. This afternoon, I finally tackled the huge stack of papers on my dining room table, and finally made my budget. It really wasn't as painful as I thought, although my mom did point out that the making of the budget isn't the hard part - it's the keeping of the budget.

Ended the afternoon with some Spanish lessons and catching up with my cousin who I hadn't talked to in a while. Another quick trip to the hospital to hold the Pulmonologist's hand, and now I'm snuggled up on the couch with a mud mask watching Oprah's All Stars.

All in all (and I realize this officially makes me old) a good productive weekend. Let's just hope I can continue the good behavior into the coming week.

Multi-tasking

Okay - have been doing okay on my resolutions.

I spend a few minutes each morning with a cup of coffee or hot tea sitting on my balcony watching the sun come up over the Atlantic. Not hard to remember to be thankful then.

I haven't honked at a single car, but must admit I have said some unkind things about some of my fellow travelers.

Haven't started a new book yet, but have been very good about my face care.

Where does that leave me? Oh yeah - a budget. I actually downloaded a budget software program that supposedly makes budgeting fun. Doubtful, but plan to start filling it out tonight. However, must admit that prior to my new period of economic responsibility, I also bought new bedding and a new camera yesterday. I knew I wanted both, and didn't want to have to account for them in my new budget. (I didn't resolve to become an adult overnight.) The camera is a Canon Rebel T1i, and I plan to take a photography class - can we say new hobby anyone?

Not even close

So we seem to rip off quite a few British shows here in this country. Many with a great deal of success - All in the Family and The Office just to name a few. However, I recently caught one of the latest and it was horrible. Unfortunately in writing this, I am having to reveal one of my closest guarded secrets. Here goes. . .

I love the BBC version of Top Gear. It is hilarious. For those of you who don't happen to have BBC America, Top Gear is a TV show about expensive cars. Yep that's right - I said that I really enjoy watching a TV show about cars. In my defense, the first time I watched I was just being polite. I was at my friends Beth and John's house, and he was watching it. However, since that time I have been hooked. Although the show is ostensibly about cars, it is truly about the cynical and quick witted three hosts. Sure you get to see some amazingly unaffordable cars with incredibly loud engines, but you keep turning in to see what Richard, James and Jeremy are up to this week.

Therein lies my complaint about the new American version that I accidentally caught the other day on the Discovery Channel. It is at it's heart a car show. The three hosts seem completely devoid of humor and or cynicism, and instead see their job as telling me the latest about whatever car they are previewing that week. This is not why I watch this show.

Thanks but no thanks. I'll stick with the original.

Better late than never

Obviously my first resolution should be to stop procrastinating. However, as I plan to make resolutions this year that I can actually keep - it is not on the list. My delay is partly due to the cold my family was kind enough to leave me when they left on Saturday, and partly related to my actually giving my resolutions a lot of thought this year.

Instead of dreaming big as I am apt to do, this year, I wanted to think small. Instead of grandiose plans to cure disease, end hunger, and establish peace all while eating perfectly and dropping thirty pounds, I wanted to force myself to come up with a specific list of things I hope to accomplish this year. A TO DO list if you like. Here goes:

1. Put myself on a budget - might as well start with the hardest one first. I am loathe to admit it, but it might be time to grow up and act responsibly. If I plan to do any shopping when I retire to Italy, I need to start saving for it now.

2. Practice Spanish at least 2 hours each week. I have now lived here for over a year, and although my medical Spanish is quite good, my conversational Spanish needs some attention. I have the resources and the opportunity to practice - I just need to do it.

3. Take better care of my face. I have good genes and have thus far been relatively lucky, but I need to actually start putting some effort into caring for my skin. Luck and genes won't hold out forever, and my face isn't getting any younger.

4. Read 12 new books this year. I love to read. However, I forget this too often and get distracted by other things. This year needs to see a little less reaching for the remote or computer, and a lot more reaching for the book on the nightstand.

5. Spend an hour each Sunday catching up with friends and family. I struggle during the week to catch up with friends. The timing just never seems right. During the weekends, I plan to catch up, but always seem to get lost in the hubbub that is a weekend. This year I plan to set aside one hour every Sunday to talk to someone or ones that is important to me.

6. Repress road rage. I have allowed Miami to turn me into an angry driver. I can't fix the amount of bad and overly aggressive drivers, but I can fix my reactions to them. Less horn blowing and more letting go is definitely in order.

7. Develop two new hobbies. I know way too many people (particularly surgeons) who never have an answer to the "what do you do for fun" question. I am afraid that I have become one of them. Shopping should not technically be a hobby, and as you can see by #4, my reading isn't what it used to be.

8. Spend five minutes each day giving thanks. I have a very bad habit of focusing on the negative. I may be driving home across the bridge with the top down, a nice ocean breeze, with a beautiful sunset behind me, but all I see is the traffic. Time to look around and be thankful for the blessed life I really lead.

9. Do four things this year that scare me. I have become too comfortable in my old age. I need to challenge myself a little. Nothing ventured - nothing gained.

10. Do four unexpected things. I am WAY too predictable, and have spent my entire life doing what was expected of me. Time to shake things up a little.

I will keep you guys informed as to how I am doing. Wishing you all luck with your own resolutions, and may we all have a fabulous 2011.