Rusty

After almost four months off work, I knew that I would be a little "rusty". My friends kept telling me that it would be in the OR, and everyone felt sorry for my first patient. Oddly, it wasn't the OR that concerned me. I was more concerned about getting back into the rhythm of the hospital

My concerns were valid. I had my first case on Monday. Although it was incredibly stressful being the one ultimately responsible, I didn't feel rusty. The OR has always been a place of comfort for me, and thankfully it was no different. Put me in gloves and had me a scalpel and life is good for me. The bigger problem that I have had is all the stuff outside of the OR.

I am struggling getting back into a rhythm with the patient. I have always felt that I had a fairly good bedside manner. I was either wrong, or it has temporarily deserted me. I have yet to feel that special connection with patients that I always enjoyed. I am also struggling figuring out this whole Attending no longer a resident thing. It is a weird line to walk.

The saddest area of "rustiness" - early mornings. For the past 12 years, early mornings were a fact of life for me. I even thought that I had turned into a morning person. Wrong! Four months of getting up at seven and having a slow start to the day have ruined me. It doesn't help that the sun doesn't even rise until 7:30. I literally live on the East coast - shouldn't the sun get up with me?

Oh well, time to get back into shape - in more ways than one.