Wednesday, September 30, 2009

CSI: Miami

Thanks to Kris, I have recently become addicted to CSI: Miami. The only "cops and robbers" show that I had previously watched was Law and Order. (The original - not a fan of the million spin-offs. ) My mom kept telling me how good the CSI's were, but I had never taken the hint. While in Nashville, I watched an episode of CSI: Miami with Kris and Bassam and got hooked.

For those of you who don't watch, it is a show about crime scene investigators who work for the Miami-Dade Police Department. Each show begins with the medical examiner and a dead body, and ends with the finding of the killer. The middle is filled with halfway realistic science, and totally inaccurate medicine (but I am used to that part). Sounds good in theory right? Watching a show about a city full of killers, drug addicts, gangsters and prostitutes is always fun - as long as you are not living in said city. Perhaps now was not the best time to become a fan.

As I run along the water in the mornings, I look for dead bodies among the rocks. As I walk around downtown, I find myself looking in the bushes (not sure for what). I am now convinced that I will either be involved in a bomb explosion or a shoot out. I pick out guys that I am convinced are drug dealers. The prostitutes are harder - the normal dress code down here would get you arrested in most states. (We'll just say that Miami women believe in showing skin - LOTS of it.) You better believe I am going to follow the first grey Hummer I see on the road in the hopes that "Eric" pops out of it.

The funniest part - instead of becoming scared to enjoy my city - I now go looking for the places I see on the show. My one pet peeve with the show is the way the characters dress. We wear a lot of white down here, but 6 inch heels and a white suit to a crime scene - please! I can only extend my fashion sense so far even in make-believe.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Have we met?

Do you ever wonder if they met at a party would your 20 year old self recognize your current self? I don't mean physically. (Don't even get me started on the unexpected side effects of aging.) I mean the inside stuff. Would the person you were at 20 want to have dinner with the person you are now?

I spent the last couple of days in Orlando with a friend from college. It made me realize again how lucky I am in regards to friends. Some of my best friends to this day I made during college. These friends survived through my medical school and surgical training. My friends have stuck by me through infrequent phone calls, last minute cancellations and constant whining about how much residency sucks.

When I see my friends, I can still see the spirit of the person I knew at 20. However, I wonder if they can see the same. I look at the me of now, and am not sure that I can still see the me of 20. I know life experiences are meant to mold the person that you become, but shouldn't the shape still be familiar?

I was optimistic and big hearted. I felt everyone was inherently good. I was quick to give trust and the benefit of the doubt. I thought I could make the world a better place. I was tenderhearted. Books, movies, and even the occasional Hallmark card brought me to tears. I was the ultimate Polly Anna. My glass was always half full, and I was always willing to share. I lived in a world of black and white with clearly recognizable moral absolutes.

What would the 20 year old me think if we met today? Would we be friends? Did enough of that girl survive the things that she has seen and experienced? Did she just don a tough exterior to survive, or did the weight of that experience change the person within. I like to think the former, but sometime I wonder.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Runner's High?

It is common knowledge that I have a love/hate relationship with running. I love what it does for my body, but hate doing it. I have always envied my "runner" friends. Not only do they all have amazing bodies, but they all talk of feeling great after a run. The so-called runner's high. Having never experienced it, I was fairly certain they were making it up. You know just another skinny girl hoax - like the one where skinny girls always say they eat whatever they want.

You have to understand that for me running has always been just something I had to survive. The last 10 minutes of my runs are as horrible as the first 10 minutes. I had read all about that wall I had to bust through, but was fairly certain I had never run far enough to actually encounter it.

Recently, I decided to give running another go. I was still convinced I would hate it, but needed the morale boost of getting back into shape. I am hoping to not jinx myself, but I am now 2 for the last 2 runs. I am doing a "Galloway" training method to get back into running shape. I do a run/walk 4 days a week. I am still fairly early in the program, but I will be honest those skinny girls may be onto something. Both of my runs this week have left me feeling energized and great. I may finally understand this whole running appeal. Now if only that eating whatever I wanted myth was true.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Little Things

Isn't it amazing how such little things can change your whole outlook on life? Usually it is the bad things that I let get to me. However, today something as simple as a grocery store made my entire day. I was walking home from the metro this afternoon when I saw a Publix. Now it is the fourth Publix within 4 blocks of my island. ( I am fine with the Publix part which is good since other than one lone Whole Foods on South Beach it is the only option.) I had tried the other 3 and quite frankly left scared. They were all cramped and dirty. I so don't do dirty grocery stores. They all also lacked organization. I mean baby supplies were on the same isle as pasta and rice. The fruit was in the same bins as the meat. They were simply bizarre.

This was not a Publix that I had noticed. It looked good from the outside, but so had the others. I walked in and heard the angels sing. It was spacious, organized, and most importantly clean. It seems like a simple thing, but it has put me in an entirely new state of mind. I may fall in love with this city after all.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Broken Promises

I broke the one promise to myself that I REALLY didn't want to break today. I cleaned my kitchen and bathrooms. I know it is a silly thing, but this one hurts. I made myself quite a few promises to survive 10 years of surgical training. They all started somewhere along the lines of "when I finish residency ___ " . The blank was usually filled with some experience that I wanted or task that I could avoid. Some were serious and some less so, but none meant as much to me as the promise of a maid.

I am somewhat obsessed about clean bathrooms. I am not quite sure what the deal is with them, but toilet bowl rings and tile grout are like nails on a chalkboard for me. The problem - I HATE to clean bathrooms. Ironic? Sure. The real painful irony - I now have 3!!!!! Throw in black granite counter tops that show every spot and stainless steal appliances that would make a CSI team ecstatic with the fingerprints to process - let us just say that hiring a maid will definitely precede buying the new furniture that I desperately need. I mean a girl has to have priorities.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

The good

I have spent quite a bit of time listing all of the things I haven't liked about Miami. I thought today I would share my favorite. Here are a few shots of the view from my balconies.

First is the view to the west. It is best seen from the balcony off of my office and guest room. In the center is the Miami river. The surrounding area is "downtown" Miami. It is mostly hotels, condos, and financial buildings. There is a drawbridge that is just off view in my direction. It is an endless source of fascination for me.

These views are to the east. In the first picture you see Northern Biscayne Bay in the forefront. This is the estuary area of the Miami river and the Atlantic. It seems to be an incredibly popular place for speed boats, jet skis, and sail boats. It is very rare to look out the window and not see at least a couple of boats out there. In the middle of the picture is the Port of Miami. It has some cargo, but mostly serves the cruise line industry. You can tell the day of the week based on when the cruise ships come and go.



This is a closer image of the Port of Miami. As you can see, the cruise line industry is still alive and well. At least 3 or 4 ships come and go each day Friday thru Monday. Just beyond the Port, you can be the skyline for Miami Beach. Miami Beach is separated from Miami by the Intercostal Waterway (aka Northern Biscayne Bay). It is divided into both a North beach and a South beach. North beach is mostly full of my age and up professionals living in some AMAZING condos.
South beach is the "hip" place to be. It is very art deco so not really my taste, but worth experiencing at least once. The lights at night are pretty awesome. The beach is gorgeous with amazing water color. You can see a little of the Atlantic at the top of the picture. On a clear day, you can see large ships on the horizon. All in all fairly fantastic. The views at night are in a class all of their own, but I can't get get pics of them with my camera. Guess you all will just have to come down and see them in person.





























Monday, September 14, 2009

Enough

Yet another frustrating trip to work this morning, it may now be mid October before my credentials come through. For me, it was the straw that broke the camel's back. I was furious, frustrated, confused, and in complete despair. It is starting to seem as if I am chasing a carrot on a stick. Every time I almost have it, it is moved slightly out of my reach.

I came home and spent the entire day wallowing in self pity. I lamented how unfair life is for me. I wailed about spending so much of my life trying to achieve something only to have a ridiculous University holding my dream hostage. All in all, I have let this entire experience "steal my joy" - to quote my friend Kris.

Well, enough is enough. As my mother has told me on more than one occasion: "life is not fair, and the sooner I get over thinking it is - the happier I will be." So this real life thing isn't all that I ever hoped. Sitting around drowning my feelings in chocolate is certainly not contributing much. I am no longer going to allow these people to steal my joy. I am in a new city full of possibility.

Starting now, I will make the most of this life experience. This is a perfect time to "get to know" my new city, study for my upcoming boards, exercise, and starting learning to be a "real" person. I am going to need help. You guys have to help keep me honest. When I start veering into self-pity, give me a hard shove back in the right direction. People and situations only have power over us if we concede it. I concede no more.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Certifiable

I have always walked a fine line between quirky and insane. I have now officially fallen into insanity. My qualifying event? Fall. . . the season not the verb.

Everyone has kindly listened to me complain for 5 of the last 9 months about how much I hated cold weather. I kept a jacket out from the movers, and used it. IT WAS THE END OF JUNE!! Since my delicate nature seems to necessitate warmer climates, one would think that Miami would be perfect for me. It is well into September, and we still haven't had a day that didn't reach the mid 90's. I am told to expect a couple of "cold" days with highs in the mid 60's come January.

So what's my problem? Television. (I have probably watched more television in the last 3 months than I have in the last 3 years. ) I am one of those strange people that actually watch the commercials. It is not that I particularly like commercials, but I hate missing a part of the show. I am not good at timing when to flip back. Over the past week, commercials (even here) have gone from summer savings to fall fashions. It has made me very nostalgic for Fall.

Is it the idea of shopping for a new season? Is it the sight of leaves changing? Is it the first bite of winter in the air? Is it the smell of cinnamon and pumpkins? I am not sure, but I have to find a way to snap out of it. I am fairly certain that fall clothes won't fit into my closet, palm trees don't change colors, 80 degrees will be my "bite" of winter, and cinnamon is not a Latin spice. I am struggling to like this city. I don't need something else to hold against it. HELP!

Sunday, September 6, 2009

What have I done?

I know it is wrong to complain about a city that I am just getting to know. I also recognize that since I haven't started to work yet I am guaranteed to like the city less. For me it takes being out and interacting with my community (i.e. the hospital) to really get to know a place.

Therefore, I have tried to be very careful about making judgements yet. I have smiled and vowed to learn Spanish. I have gritted my teeth and tried to adapt to a more laissez-faire approach to work. However, tonight crossed the line. I decided this afternoon that Indian or Thai would be really good for dinner. I sat down at my trusty computer and set out to find the appropriate place. Since I am still in sweats (despite the fact that I never actually made it to the gym), I wanted delivery.

You can not get Thai, Indian, Italian or Chinese delivered in this town. No - I am not exaggerating. What city doesn't have bad delivery Chinese? I called everybody. You can get Cuban, Cuban and oh yea Cuban. That's it. There are other ethnic restaurants, but they don't deliver. Where am I????

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Coincidence?

I have reached the worst part of unpacking. You know the part where it occurs to you that you have way more crap than space to store said crap. The part where you get creative and decide that the 1/2 bath is a great place to store boots?

As I was attempting to put one more skirt into my overstuffed closet, I turn on the television for a break. What you might ask is on? An A&E special about Hoarders. Yes, they were going into the homes of people who were compulsive shoppers and showing the massive amounts of things in their homes. These people were living in the most deplorable conditions. As I watched horrified, I looked around my living room. Everywhere I looked I saw signs of conspicuous consumption.

I immediately got up and started editing my closet. I am giving away two large boxes of clothes, and yet my closet is still full. What is wrong with me???? Everyone is dying to see my new apartment - it looks like they will only have to turn on A&E.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Penis Envy???

You know the old tale that men who drive sport cars are lacking in a certain area? Well, let's hope that is not true or else I am going to have a very sad dating life here in Miami. As most of you know, I am not much of a car person - or at least I wasn't. I am quickly becoming one.

It all started as I went to my car the other day. Walking out of my condo building I walked past a beautiful white car. Upon closer inspection I realized it was an Aston Martin (the James Bond car). Sitting in the parking space next to it is a baby blue Lamborghini. I kid you not. As one continues on to my car, you pass three Porsches (two boxsters and a carrera), numerous BMWs and AMG Mercedes, a Ferrari, two Range Rovers and finally a black Maserati in the parking space next to mine. I have the only American car in the place.

At first I thought that maybe I was just in the wrong building, but no these cars are everywhere. You can not drive down the road without seeing at least a dozen cars that cost more than I will make this year (as a "real" surgeon). I even saw a Porsche SUV - now why on earth does one need a Porsche SUV. I must admit that it makes driving around really fun, but really makes me despair regarding the "boys" in this town.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Something new everyday?

"They" say that you learn something new everyday. I have never really bought into that one. Several days go past where I sail through life blissfully unlearned. In the last couple of days, I have been "catching" up on those wasted opportunities. I have done nothing but learn new lessons.

Lesson One - - Although moving companies are not on my favorites list, I am developing a soft spot for moving men. I blogged earlier about the four burly Philly men who packed up my unmentionables. They were all incredibly nice and seemed to enjoy having a good time. Yesterday, four Latino men delivered my unmentionables. They have a job that I don't envy, but were super polite and went out of their way to welcome me to Miami.

Lesson Two - Great Views have huge advantages. I know this one seems obvious, but the advantages weren't quite what I was expecting. I realized it would be relaxing for me to walk outside and gaze at the water. I was unaware of how much everyone else would enjoy the view. Every workman that has been to my place the last week has exclaimed over the view. I invited them all to go out and take a look. While they are gazing around at the city in which they live, they offer great information. I now know locations for supposedly good restaurants, shopping, swimming, sunning, and hooking.

Lesson Three - Granite counter tops have no bounce. This is my first experience with granite counter tops (butcher block is plenty good enough for my mom who hates to cook). I love the idea of them - I probably wouldn't have gone with such a dark shade of black with matching tall back splash. Although I am learning that one must be more gentle that usual when placing things on the counter top. I have lost one platter and two glasses so far to this lesson. (Limestone floors also very unforgiving and COLD.)

Lesson Four - I have a serious shopping problem. Now this one is an oldie but a goodie. I am not sure why I can never get this lesson to stick. Every time I move, and try to cram all of my stuff into whatever place I am currently residing my problem is glaringly obvious. I always swear that I am going to stop shopping - usually lasts a month - and then I am right back to my old ways.

Lesson Five - Miami condos do not have coat closets. While this may seem like a logical choice to those who have always lived in Miami, it is ridiculous for the rest of us. I recognize that I have way too many coats for a girl that has spent most of her life in the South, but all I am asking for is a little corner somewhere to put them. Do people not have coats at all down here? Surely they didn't mean for me to put them in my jam packed walk-in closet? --- I refer them to lesson four.

Back to unpacking.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

More Vacation !?@#!

I know one should never complain about time off, but in all honesty - I am so OVER it. I want to work!!!! Don't get me wrong, it has been great. Two months of relative rest and relaxation after 10 years of surgical training is exactly what the doctor ordered. However, it is now time for the doctor to go back to work. I am just not meant for the idle life.

I have been bored for about 6 weeks now, but trying to stick it out because it seemed impolite to complain. I know lots of people who would have killed for eight weeks of nothingness. Turns out, I am not one of those people. All is well and good for the first little bit, and then one runs out of nothingness to do. I mean a girl can only sleep and read so much, and don't even get me started on daytime television.

So why am I still on vacation? Licensure. I honestly don't understand how you hear stories about people practicing without the appropriate credentials. I applied for my Florida license in June. I was obsessively (shocking I know) compulsive about getting my paperwork in to the board in a timely manner, and still I did not get my license until today.

The good news . . . I got my Florida license today. The bad news . . . now I still have to get credentialed at the two hospitals. I haven't been able to turn in my credentialing paperwork until I had a license. All in all it seems that I am at least looking at another 2-4 weeks of "vacation". I am not sure I can handle it - I REALLY NEED A LIFE AGAIN.