Enough

Yet another frustrating trip to work this morning, it may now be mid October before my credentials come through. For me, it was the straw that broke the camel's back. I was furious, frustrated, confused, and in complete despair. It is starting to seem as if I am chasing a carrot on a stick. Every time I almost have it, it is moved slightly out of my reach.

I came home and spent the entire day wallowing in self pity. I lamented how unfair life is for me. I wailed about spending so much of my life trying to achieve something only to have a ridiculous University holding my dream hostage. All in all, I have let this entire experience "steal my joy" - to quote my friend Kris.

Well, enough is enough. As my mother has told me on more than one occasion: "life is not fair, and the sooner I get over thinking it is - the happier I will be." So this real life thing isn't all that I ever hoped. Sitting around drowning my feelings in chocolate is certainly not contributing much. I am no longer going to allow these people to steal my joy. I am in a new city full of possibility.

Starting now, I will make the most of this life experience. This is a perfect time to "get to know" my new city, study for my upcoming boards, exercise, and starting learning to be a "real" person. I am going to need help. You guys have to help keep me honest. When I start veering into self-pity, give me a hard shove back in the right direction. People and situations only have power over us if we concede it. I concede no more.